Of Bars, Booze, and Bartending - Proving "Coughlin's Law" Invalid Since Feb '05

Friday, June 03, 2005

A Shout-Out to Bouncers and Doormen

It's been a little while since Tavern Wench tended bar in the Club World. Those days were fun.

Coming to work at 9:00 pm, waiting on club kids by 11:00 pm, chucking the quarters they'd tip me at their heads as they walked away. That was our favorite pasttime, throwing quarters at customers. It was dark, of course, and we'd laugh at them while their hands clutched their heads in the universal "what the fuck was THAT?" motion. At the end of the night, we'd sweep up the quarters from the dance floor, and they'd almost always total 50 bucks or more. Tip me a quarter, and it's going to come back to you, hopefully on the top of your head while you're chatting up some hot, drunk girl. Choad.

In those days, I made wheelbarrows full of money, which I didn't save. I'm an idiot, but not unlike most bartenders during the height of their club-tending, cash-cow days. I feel slightly less inadequate, knowing I'm in good company.

I only just found
this wonderful blog, written by a New York bouncer/doorman. It's fantastic, and I'm going to spend the next few hours reading it and reliving my days in club bartending.

Bouncers and Doormen deserve recognition and accolades. They've gotten me out of many a sticky situation. The most common situation is refusing service to a loud, too drunk, obnoxious under-25 male. Often, these males would climb over the bar and attempt to ring my neck. I was always able to snake out of their grasp (Sober Bartenders are quite a bit quicker than Drunken Patrons), flip the lights, and suddenly Under-25 Male would find himself lifted by his armpits and carried out of the club by a relative army of men. No questions, no comments, no strongly-worded letters to management. Problem solved, keep the party going. Bartenders Heart Bouncers!!

Check it out, bar fans! And be prepared to laugh out loud. The guy is a great writer, and funny as hell.

Clublife - an online narrative of the life of a bouncer at two of New York's most popular nightclubs